Ok, now what?

It hasn't been a good couple weeks for me. I am stressed, tired, fried and throwing up stomach acid for fun. I have a headache and while I'd like to stay home and sleep, we've learned that gets me in more trouble than its worth.

So, I dragged my fatigued self to work and carry on, while pondering if breakfast will stay down.

I am at point where I am not sure I made the right decisions. I am not sure which direction I should be heading in. I am doubting how I'm raising my kids. I just want to stay in bed and bury my head under the covers. I'm passed my normal depressed state, which leads me to take 10 bags full of stuff to the charity bins and there is more waiting in my living room. Yes, I clean when depressed. Now, I'm in the, yeah-I-guess-I-still-need-to-eat-more-than-coffee mode.

And you know what? Talking DOES NOT HELP. No, wait, we already knew that. No one gets where I come from and what I have been through. So, I keep my mouth shut for the most part.
And I have tried hard NOT to be too sarcastic and snarky this week on Facebook and Twitter. Why do you think I haven't been writing here? You really don't want to hear my latest opinion that you cannot reject feeding tubes if you're Catholic. Maybe you do. I don't want to ponder that the church thinks my grandma was a bad Catholic for wanting quality, NOT quantity of life.

I could tell you about my tax fiasco this year, but I really don't want to think about it again until April 15th. And then get drunk before mailing the forms in.

I could tell you how our church decided to do a photo directory of all the parishioners and I am not sure I want to be in it. I am not as cute (or tiny) (or fashionable) as the moms at Bri's school.

Anyhow, I will try to come up with something happy to write about soon. Maybe I can tell you about the taffy pull we took the Brownies on. Maybe I'll write on the joy that will be my busy weekend coming up.

But today is not that day.